Saturday, April 7, 2012

Seed Mead

Nectar Of The Gods: How To Make "Mjodr Holdr Hlada" Or "Seed Mead"

You can produce a uniquely "male" version of this most ancient, noble and manly of beverages with this simple recipe. Here offered in good faith to hedonist brethren for celebrating the blessings of masculinity, virility, fertility and brotherhood.

"... Valhall's burly warriors round-partake
the Mead-Horns, rich with the milky froth of gold, . . ."


The drink of Celtic kings and Viking warriors, Mead was consumed to assure fertility and has been the beverage of festivals, ritual and ceremony for a few thousand years. "Seed Mead" is an enhancement of this celestial libation's mystical qualities...

Basic concepts:

Making Mead is really very simple and although adding Semen as an ingredient adds complexity it is not difficult and can be very inspiring. You combine water and yeast with some ‘food’ for the yeast (honey), flavoring agents and a good measure of fine manspunk. The addition of semen can provide a unique taste element and the notion that you are imbibing the true "nectar of the Gods" as part of the elixir, makes for an erotic, virile experience. The yeast bubbles away in an anaerobic environment, turning some of the sugars into alcohol and you get a nice, manly beverage at the end.

You will be adding wine yeast (or sherry or champagne yeast) to do the fermenting. You will want to keep all of the other ‘wild’ yeasts in the air out of your mead, since they may sour it. As a result, wash everything with a mild bleach solution and rinse it very well before you use it. This includes pots and pans, funnels and especially glass jugs/bottles.



Ingredients:

2 or 3 cloves, lightly cracked
2 sticks of cinnamon, cracked
dash of cardamom
2 long orange peels
2 to 4 teaspoons fresh lemon zest (just the thin yellow part, not the white part of the peel)
2 lbs. raw natural honey (not processed - get this at a health food store)
1 packet of wine yeast*
1/4 - 3/4 cup (can add up to 1 cup) semen (it works better if it has been frozen then thawed before adding) Note: the semen may be yours alone, a partner's (both for a romantic quality) or the collected ejaculate of the males in your circle (particularly if it will be used for ritual/ceremony/celebration)
1 gallon pure spring water
1/4 cup vodka or grain alcohol

Optional flavoring to include if desired:
1/4 tsp. fresh rosemary
1-2 vanilla beans
5-7 oz. sliced fresh ginger root (1 finger's length)
nutmeg

*Get this yeast at a homebrew shop. Some to try are: Flor Sherry, Cotes des Blancs.

Equipment:

large stockpot, 4 quarts or larger with lid (or use plastic wrap to cover)
strainer or sieve
1 glass wine jug (but 2 will make it easier)
a large funnel

Optional Equipment: (definitely not necessary, but more “professional”)
rubber stopper and airlock to fit the glass jug
specific gravity indicator
commercial “yeast nutrient”
wine bottles for serving (or sharing!) the mead more easily

Method: 

Note before beginning: There are three ways you can choose to introduce the semen depending desired outcome and how much you are willing to experiment with flavor, etc:1)You may choose to add it for inclusion in the fermentation stage (since it is sugar-based it will ferment - an aspect that arouses some) 2) You may rack it into the mead after fermentation is complete. 3) Or you may do both if your desire compels you. Instructions for these processes are included below and are noted with an asterisk...



Day 1*:
 During a waxing moon, to encourage the mead to ripen: Clean the stockpot with a bleach solution and rinse well. Put cloves, cinnamon, cardamom and lemon peel in about 2 quarts of water and simmer for about 15 minutes, until the spices have scented the water. Add water to bring the volume to about 3 quarts, and return to a simmer. Add the honey and *semen (if you choose for it to be included in the fermenting process) stirring constantly, and heat but do not boil. Skim off white foam (or scum) as it forms. If the foam is yellow, reduce the heat. When no more scum forms, remove the pot from the heat, cover it to keep out airborne yeast, and leave it overnight. It must reach room temperature before you continue, or you will kill the yeast.

Day 2: Strain the mixture to remove as much of the spice particles as possible. You will have to strain it into something, so use another (cleaned and rinsed) pot, or the (cleaned and rinsed) wine jug. The mixture should end up back in your large stockpot. Add the packet of yeast, stir it in, and put the cover back on.

Day 3 or 4: When the yeast has formed a thick foam on the surface of the liquid. (Preferably before this foam sinks like a rock to the bottom of the pot - But if the foam does sink, it’s not a big deal) - it’s time to proceed with this step. Rack the mixture to a jug, leaving the foam and dregs of yeast behind. (“Racking” is the term for transferring liquid. Use a clean funnel. Add enough boiled, cooled water to reach the neck of your jug. To seal the jug but allow gases to escape, cover it with a double layer of paper towel, held on by a rubber band. Leave the jug somewhere at room temperature, and watch it to make sure the paper towel doesn’t get fouled with foam. (If it does, just replace the paper towel with a clean one.)

2 to 4 days later: Wait until the vigorous foaming stops, or at least 2 days. Make sure the paper towel is clean, and move the jug to the refrigerator.

12 to 24 hours later*: Rack the mead (it’s becoming mead now!) to a clean jug, put on a clean paper towel, and return it to the refrigerator. *If you wish to add the semen after the fermentation process, prepare a semen-alcohol mixture now. Mix the semen with 1/4 cup vodka or grain alcohol, strain repeatedly mixing well until a milky tone is achieved. Cover and save.

12 to 24 hours later: Rack the mead to a clean jug again. and add 1/4 cup of vodka or grain alcohol (or semen-alcohol mixture) to kill the yeast. Stir well. Put on a clean paper towel, and return the jug to the refrigerator.

Keep the mead in the jug in the refrigerator for 3 or 4 days. Then bottle the mead, using a clean funnel. The mead will be drinkable in 10 days and really good in about 2 1/2 weeks. Start this mead about a month before you want to serve it and it turns out well. Keep the mead refrigerated.



Serve it in a ceremonial horn, chalice or goblet for Samhain, Yule, 12th Night, Imbolc and any Rituals or lusty occassions where the male essence is desired but don’t let it get too old and certainly drink it within 6 months. Although it is "honey wine" It’s not meant to age like grape wine. Following an old Irish tradition, men can drink the "seed mead" for 30 consecutive days to assure virilty and fertility, aiding them in their successful pursuit of a partner!

Keep in mind that you’re dealing with living yeast, wild honey and the variable qualities of human semen. Your results won’t be entirely predictable and you should adjust things as you see fit. Occasionally, things just won’t work the way you expect. It just happens, so don’t be discouraged and try again...

submitted by: Egilmiddle image courtesy: four20bottom

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